Bad News

"Kurosaki-kun," a man in a white lab coat stepped into the room holding a chart that held papers which he was flipping through. "I'm glad you came in now. I've got some good news and some bad news for you although I suppose neither news is all that great."

Ichigo leaned back in his chair and crossed his legs, frowning. "What do you mean bad news?"

"Well which news do you want first?"

Ichigo sighed irritably. "People almost always ask that question when they know the answer already. Just tell me the bad news first." Unknowingly to Ichigo, his leg was shaking from being nervous. Something was happening in his body and he knew it wasn't quite right.

The doctor sighed and placed the clipboard on the bed and leaned back against it, crossing his arms across his chest. "You seem to have a terrible infection somewhere in your body that has caused your bladder to shrink to a size not befitting of your body. It'll cause you to have unexplainable accidents and sadly you won't be able to control it. The other part of this bad news is that, as we don't know where the infection is, or quite what it is for that matter, we can't give you any antibiotics to clear it up."

Ichigo looked dumbfounded and felt less arrogant than when he'd walked in here. He wasn't here of his own will. After having a few too many unusual night accidents his dad had told him to come to the clinic. His father told him that he would've done it himself but felt that he had inadequate equipment for looking at what Ichigo had. And of course he'd been mostly right. When he'd gotten to the clinic and told all of the nurses his symptoms, suddenly they were taking a bunch of complex tests he hadn't asked for. He'd been pricked with needles and prodded mercilessly by instruments he'd never even heard of. And all of that irritating pain had led down to this one minute in time. "S-so," Ichigo had to clear his throat slightly before he could speak, "if that's the bad news, than what the hell is the good news?"

The doctor gave him a sympathetic smile. "I told you even the good news isn't all that great. Because of how the infection is affecting your body we're guessing that if we leave it alone for long enough it'll clear up on it's own if nothing inflames it or if it doesn't worsen. It's more likely, though, to clear up on it's own." He clarified quickly when he saw the look on Ichigo's face.

Under his breath Ichigo muttered, "I think I would've just rather not known, now." To the doctor he said, "So what exactly does that mean for me?"

"Well," the doctor started slowly, trying to choose his words carefully, "it'll worsen a little before it get's better. You said so far the accidents have only happened at night, right?" Ichigo nodded, rigid-jawed. "Well you're more than likely to start having accidents during the day. What I would suggest is that you go and buy some Depends. Just enough for a week or so. Of course if it's not cleared up by then, keep buying them for a couple of weeks. But if it persists more than two or three weeks, stop wearing them. Wearing them might cause you to regress and lose the control over your bladder completely. It would mean having to repotty train you."

Ichigo cringed at the words. The man in the white lab coat was basically telling him he had to wear diapers or he'd make a mess of himself in front of everyone. Which was worse? Being humiliated in diapers or being humiliated by pissing his own pants? It was a hard choice. "Is that it, doctor?"

"Give this note to your dad," he scribbled a messy note on a sheet of paper, "and you're good to go. Don't forget to stop in at a store and pick up supplies. Also, when wearing Depends, don't stay wet too long or a rash is going to occur and those are painful, let me tell you. Pick up a small bottle of baby powder or talcum powder and you shouldn't have to worry about it too much then."

Ichigo stood and held his hand out stiffly as he said, "Thanks." As he walked out the door the doctor handed him the note and wished him the best of luck. Feeling ill now, Ichigo said nothing but headed out the door and down the street. He took a slight detour from his pretty straight route home so that he could stop at a small store where he could pick up supplies. He was old enough not to make a big fuss out of this. Wearing them wouldn't emasculate him any. Right? His confidence begin to wane as he moved almost mechanically to the incontinence aisle. Luckily there were few people in the store to see him. Once he was in front of the numerous packs of adult diapers he couldn't help but to keep looking over his shoulders to make sure no one was looking. His nerves felt like they were standing on end. All I have to do is choose one and get the hell out of here. It's not that hard. The chocolate brown eyes scanned over them and he grabbed the first one he saw that he thought would fit. Quickly he plucked it from the shelf before rushing to the check-out line. No one was there either. Once he placed them on the counter he made sure to keep his eyes down and to not make any eye contact with the cashier.

Which was unfortunate. The cashier that morning was a perky old lady with white tufts of hair and a more than cheery disposition. "Well good morning young man! What's with the long face? It's too bright a morning to be down in the dumps."

Ichigo cringed when she said dumps. It made him realize that he kind of had to pee and the urge was growing stronger. "I'm not down." He replied, looking up and forcing a cheesy smile on his face. "I'm just here to pick up some supplies for my grandmother. She's rather sickly and asked me to do it for her." The lie seemed plausible but it was also one that almost any person could see right through.

"That'll be eighteen dollars and sixty-seven cents please. Well I hope she'll feel better soon. The elderly don't heal as quickly due to their old age and many years of living." The women smiled at Ichigo.

Ichigo's eyes flew open at the price. "Are you sure that's how much it is? It seems so... expensive." Ichigo handed her a twenty and all but ignored her comment about the elderly. Quite frankly he didn't care.

She took it and opened the machine. "Sadly yes. Is this your first time buying this for your grandmother, dear?"

"Yeah. Usually my dad is the one who does it. He runs a clinic so he knows better what's good and what's bad." Ichigo began to get antsy and was rocking back and forth on his feet. He really just wanted to get the hell out of there and never turn back. And the urge to pee was growing stronger. If he didn't get going soon he had a feeling he wasn't going to make it home.

"Well, let her know that a nosy cashier told her to feel better soon. Here's your change and come back soon!"

Ichigo hurriedly took the bag, and change, that was handed to him. He thanked her before dashing out the door, feeling his face light up. I'm never doing that again. Ever. He proclaimed to himself, shaking his head. He ran a good ninety percent of the way home before he finally slowed down to let his breath catch up to him slightly. He slowly trudged the last twenty feet back to his house, thinking the entire time, just a little further. Let me hold it just a little longer. Please God give me just this one thing. Just as he reached out to open the door his bladder gave out, soaking his clothes. Urine dripped slowly down his leg before pooling by his feet. Ichigo gave an aggravated cry, wishing he'd left even a minute earlier so he could've made it home on time. The doctor told me that it would be likely I'd have daytime accidents soon but this soon? This is just ridiculous. Angry now, and wishing he could just crawl in a hole and die, Ichigo pushed open the door and dragged himself through the threshold. Quickly he kicked off his shoes before hurrying up the stairs, not bothering to call out that he was home. Just as he reached the top of his stairs his dad came out of his room, a goofy grin on his face. When he noticed Ichigo though his smile faded.

"What's the matter son? You look upset." Ichigo didn't reply but tried to push around his father instead. But his father was quick and caught him by the shoulder. He was about to ask what was wrong again but a scent caught his attention. Taking an inconspicuous sniff he tried to figure out what it was. It took him one more sniff before realizing what it was. He let out a soft, "Oh." after glancing down at the front of Ichigo's pants which had turned a dark brown. Looking up again he said calmly, "It's okay Ichigo. Don't worry about it."

"Like hell I won't worry about it." Ichigo retorted, struggling to get away. It came out sharper than he had intended and he almost felt bad. But it didn't seem to have any effect on his dad, this of which he was thankful for.

Instead Isshin just let out a small sigh. One that almost sounded apologetic. "If you need anything let me know. I'll be down the hallway." Isshin gripped Ichigo's shoulder in a fatherly way before disappearing down the hallway. More than humiliated now Ichigo moved over to his bedroom where he immediately stripped down.

Everything was sopping wet. The front of his pants had a large, dark, circle at the crotch and had strips of dark trailing all the way down to his ankles. His boxers were wet front and back. Sighing and taking a deep breath, Ichigo discarded both of them, throwing them halfheartedly into the laundry basket on the opposite side of his room. I should take a shower before changing into anything else. He decided, finally coming to terms with his predicament. Slowly he opened his door and peaked his head around it. There was no one in sight so he slipped out the door and quickly tip-toed down the hall into the bathroom. After filling the tub he slipped in and let himself soak. It wasn't relaxing though because all he could think about was the visit to the doctors office, the store, the diapers, and what he was going to do during school. There was no way he could tell any of his friends about it. That was just impossible. I should probably tell Ishida at least... I mean... He is my boyfriend right? Ichigo sighed and then he had to laugh himself. He'd been so worried about the diapers emasculating him that he'd completely forgotten he was gay. Nothing could emasculate him more than that. For some reason the thought soothed him a little, even though he hated admitting he was gay and admitting that he had a slightly feminine side.

The water started to turn chilly and Ichigo's skin had begun to prune before he pulled himself out of the tub. Shivering, he quickly wrapped a towel around his waist and disappeared around the door and down the hall before anyone could notice. He was still shivering inside his room but he knew he had to get dressed. It would be horrible if his bladder gave out while in his room. Slowly he turned to stare at the bag that was still on his bed. The tiny thing looked so threatening just sitting there. It was so terrifying. Cautiously he reached out and took it in his hands like it was a time bomb that would go off if he didn't handle it right. Then he pealed away the bag, leaving only the bag the diapers were in and the diapers himself. Glancing more carefully at the bag now, Ichigo noticed something. The ones he'd grabbed weren't the simple pull on kind. They weren't the protective underwear. They were diapers with actual straps and everything. Shit. He thought, sighing. This is going to be a whole lot of fun. Finding the dotted line Ichigo pulled the plastic apart to reveal the white plastic inside. He grabbed one before casting the rest of them aside. Unfurling it he placed it down on his bed before letting the towel that was still around his waist drop to the floor. He then proceeded to sit down, listening to the heavy crinkling of the plastic. Once he'd found himself in the right position he pulled the front up but couldn't find the tapes. He realized after a minute it was backwards so he stood slightly and shifted the thing until it was the right way. After fumbling around with the tapes for a few minutes he finally got them right and pulled them across his belly, fastening it. Upon standing though the diaper became loose and sagged. So Ichigo unfastened them, one side then the other, and attempted to make it tighter. That didn't work either. It was either too tight or too loose. After nearly ten minutes of struggling Ichigo gave up and waddled -yes waddled- to his door and called quietly, "Dad, come here. I don't like asking you for help but this damn thing is a royal pain in the ass." His dad just couldn't mind his own damn business. He waddled backwards just in time for his door burst open almost immediately.

"What's it that you need help with, son?" Isshin asked, as though he didn't already know.

Ichigo glared at him and said nothing, feeling awkward being half naked and in a diaper in front of his father. Isshin was only making things worse.

Isshin understood the glare and settled down, composing his face in a millisecond. "Just lay down on the bed. You're going to be extremely uncomfortable-"

"More so than I am now?" Ichigo bit out.

"Yes. But you're going to have to deal with it for now. You're strong Ichigo and this is just a little road bump on your road to becoming a great man. Everyone has their time in life when something blocks their way."

Ichigo growled. "Not now dad. Just get this over with."

Isshin shut his mouth and gestured for Ichigo to lay back down on his bed. When he lay flat, Ichigo felt a slight tug at his waist and heard the tapes being ripped away. Then the diaper was being readjusted over him before it was brought up around his waist again and was fastened almost as tight as he'd had it when he'd been standing.

"Dad, that's too tight." He grouched, trying to sit up.

"It's fine. It'll be looser when you stand."

"Yeah right."

"Ichigo, I've been changing diapers for more years than you've been alive. I should know how to do them properly by now. In fact this is kind of nostalgic for me. I still remember changing you when you were still in diapers. You were much cuter then and a lot less fussy." Isshin slid his fingers into the leg holes and ran them around Ichigo's outer and inner thighs, making sure it wasn't clumped before standing and holding his hand out to his son. He hadn't realized it but Ichigo had turned bright pink when he'd suddenly stuck his fingers inside of it. "Sorry." He muttered, smiling gently. It had been awhile since Ichigo had seemed so fragile and he'd nearly forgotten that his son was still a kid, deep down inside. No matter how many bad things he'd fought and no matter how many he'd fight later on.

Taking his dad's hand, Ichigo forced himself into a sitting position before he murmured almost soundlessly, "Thanks."

"Lunch is ready downstairs when you're ready to eat." Isshin turned to leave but was stopped by Ichigo's sudden plea.

"Dad, don't tell Karin or Yuzu about this. I don't want to worry them or anything. If they ask tell them I'm completely fine."

"You shouldn't lie to your siblings, Ichigo. They're family."

"Please dad. Just this once lie to them for me."

Sighing out of slight exhaustion from that days events Isshin replied firmly, "Just this once. See you downstairs." That was all he said before slipping through the door, closing it silently behind him. Now Ichigo was alone with his thoughts once again. It had been more pleasant with his dad there to distract him.

Standing he half-walked, half-waddled, over to his closet where he reached in and pulled out a pair of pajama pants. In an instant he had slipped them on before he had fallen face first into his pillows. The diapers crinkle reached his ears and all he wanted to do was cry. He was already dressed liked a baby, he thought, so what difference would a few tears make. After crawling under his covers that's exactly what he did do. He began crying and cried until he slipped off into an unrestful sleep.

Ichigo didn't wake up again until after dark. Glancing at his clock he rubbed his eyes and groaned. It was after ten already. Groggily he pulled his legs from under the cover and stood up, dragging his feet towards the door. Still half asleep he didn't realize that his diaper was wet. And he didn't realize it until he reached the bathroom where he went to take off his sleep pants and imaginary boxers and let loose a stream of urine. Not hearing the sound of urine hitting the toilet water Ichigo shook himself more awake and groaned again, louder this time, when he realized that he was going in the diaper. By now it was too late to stop himself from going where he was standing, though, so he let himself finish before slumping against his sink, letting his forehead crash against the mirror. I can't believe I went while I was awake. Or half awake at least. God dammit, what's happening to me? He kneaded the sink with his knuckles as he closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, hoping to steady himself. It only made him want to cry again though. He felt so out of character. He hadn't cried since he was nine and he hadn't wet the bed since he was... He didn't even remember the last time he'd wet the bed. (Not counting all the times over the last couple of weeks.) As Ichigo tried to calm himself there came a soft knock at the door that startled him. "What?" He snapped, trying to cover the shakiness of his voice with a low growl. (Which failed because even the growl sounded shaky.)

"Are you hungry? I can make you something." His dad's calm, quiet, voice floated through the door and in an instant Ichigo calmed down, letting his lungs take in as much air as they could before releasing again. He almost didn't notice he was hyperventilating. "Or there's leftovers if you want it."

"No thanks. Not hungry." Ichigo replied in a much calmer voice. "I'll just eat a big breakfast tomorrow morning."

"About that," his dad paused mid-thought, "if you don't want to go tomorrow, to give yourself a few days to get used to things, I'll let you stay home."

The suggestion was tempting. Very very tempting. But if Ichigo didn't show up to school for no apparent good reason his friends would wonder and would then stop by and then he'd have to explain everything because the three people he just couldn't lie to were his closest friends. "No. I've gotta go. I have a test tomorrow I think."

"Alright. Can I come in though? You've been in there awhile."

"Sure." Ichigo didn't bother to pull up his pajama bottoms. It wasn't anything his father hadn't seen before anyways. The door clicked and his father stepped into the room, dressed still in his lab coat and work clothes. "Late night tonight?" He asked, worrying that he was keeping his dad from work.

"Yeah. There were just a few stray patients that needed some attending to. So what were you doing in here?" Isshin asked, frowning slightly.

Ichigo shrugged and reached down to grab his pants finally. "Nothing."

Isshin raised an eyebrow but said nothing about it. "Come here real quick. I just want to check." He reached out and once again stuck a finger inside the leg hole and pressed down slightly. It's wet. More wet than usual. He's not getting worse is he? He glanced at Ichigo with an odd look on his face. A searching look.

Ichigo pulled away at this. "What do you think you're doing?" He hissed, stepping back. That had been unexpected and Ichigo didn't like it at all. There were many things he could handle like fighting things a thousand times his size but he couldn't handle people touching him unexpectedly. It just didn't work that way.

"Checking."

"What?"

"To see if you're wet of course. Didn't the doctor tell you you shouldn't stay wet for very long or you'll get a rash?"

"Yeah but can't you ask me rather than sticking fingers in places they don't belong?" He hissed, bringing his legs together out of reflex. A second later he regretted it as he heard the squish of the wet plastic and as he felt the small drops of urine slide down his leg.

Isshin held his hands up defensively. "Sorry son. It gets to be habit. Children when they're young can't tell you they're wet so you have to check yourself. Not that I'm implying your childish it's just that age old habits die hard. I'll remember to just ask next time."

Still glaring slightly Ichigo nodded.

"Anyway, it's time for us to go to sleep. I know you've slept a lot today but I want you to be awake for classes tomorrow since you're going. Can you change yourself or would you prefer I do it?"

Saying nothing Ichigo strutted to his room, followed closely by his father (who had grabbed a small thing of wet wipes) who watched as he went to his closet and picked something up, throwing it at him. Fumbling with the package, he barely managed to catch it. It was the bag of diapers. His son had already laid himself down on his bed with his forearm covering his face. It's a good thing he's strong willed or he'd never be able to endure this. My son is strong. And he'll continue to grow stronger. That is if this event doesn't break him first. Kneeling in front of the bed Isshin reached up to the tapes and asked before yanking them apart, "Are you sure, Ichigo? I'm going to have to clean you up first before I can put a new one on." When there was no reply after a minute of waiting Isshin continued, yanking the tapes apart and pulling the front down. His nose was assaulted by the smell of pee and he gagged slightly. It had been a long while since he'd changed diapers and baby pee just didn't seem to smell as bad. But he trudged forward. He reached down next to him and pulled out a wet wipe from the pack he'd set next to him. As quickly as he could, but without being rough, he cleaned up his son's private area. Then he reached out and grabbed a fresh one from the pack and unfurled it. "Push up a little so I can pull it out." Ichigo complied, his arm still covering his face. Isshin quickly pulled it out and then replaced it with the fresh one. "You can lay again." The boy slumped into the bed. As quickly as he could, again, Isshin pulled the front up around his waist and then fastened it, just a bit tighter than the other. He'd noticed it had sagged quite a bit after it had been used. Rolling the used one up Isshin stood and stared down at his son, sympathy, and compassion, in his eyes. "See you in the morning. I'll make sure Yuzu cooks a nice big breakfast for you. You'll need it." Turning he walked out of the room, throwing the other diaper in the trash as he did so.

After he was sure his father had gone, Ichigo pulled his covers over him and closed his eyes. There was no point fussing over what had happened to him and it wasn't going to make it go away, either. He'd just continue living the way he always had. The only difference would be that his undergarments would be a bit different. That was it.

Convincing himself of this, Ichigo fell into a much deeper, much more dreamless, sleep.